TV
Hwang Hye-young complains of parenting anxiety
Channel A's 'Oh Eun-young's Golden Counseling Center', scheduled to air at 8:10 pm on the 6th, will be visited by Hwang Hye-young and Kim Kyeong-rok of Tutu, the 'original ice princess' singers of the 90s.
After marrying her politician-turned-husband, Kim Gyeong-rok, Hye-young Hwang became the CEO of an online shopping mall for 18 years and achieved annual sales of KRW 10 billion. In addition to her success as a businesswoman, she gave birth to twins and shared her happy married life.
Hwang Hye-young’s husband, Kim Gyeong-rok, expresses his concerns, “What should I do with my wife who is anxious about raising children?” Dr. Eunyoung Oh conducted a parenting anxiety test to find out Hyeyoung Hwang's level of anxiety. Accordingly, Hwang Hye-young feels anxious even playing with her children for an hour at the playground in front of her house, which is level 4. Dr. Oh Eun-young says, “The level of anxiety about parenting is at the highest level,” and points out that they are overly controlling and practicing “sterile room childcare.” He also warns that Hwang Hye-young's anxiety may affect her children. In fact, test results show that children are affected by anxiety, adding shock to a situation where there are concerns about anxiety being passed down from generation to generation.
Dr. Eun-young Oh watches the interview video of Hye-young Hwang, explaining that in order to lower Hye-young Hwang's anxiety, we need to know where it started. In the video, Hwang Hye-young speculates that the cause of her anxiety is her childhood memories and says, “My father and mother always fought.” “After a fight, my mother drove to Seoul early in the morning, so when I was young, I opened my closet when I woke up in the morning,” he recalled. “If I saw the clothes that my mother wore every day, I felt reassured that she had not gone.” . He also said, “One day, my mom grabbed my clothes before I left, but she shook me off and took a taxi. I couldn’t even put on my shoes and ran after the taxi.” He then shed tears as he said, “I still dream about that scene to this day.”
Hwang Hye-young confesses that she made herself the target of her anger by saying things like, “Mom often said that she wouldn’t have lived like this if it weren’t for you,” and “I have the same shadow as my dad.” However, in the case of my younger brother, he always said that he took him with him when he left. Accordingly, Dr. Eun-young Oh looked at Hye-young Hwang's sentence completion test and said that she answered things like “My mother is in a bad relationship” and “No matter what I do, the things I want to forget are my childhood memories.” Hwang Hye-young adds to her sorrow by saying that when she was young, “My mother left me a puppy and named her ‘Mami.’” “I walked around the house with the puppy in my arms until the sun set and then fell asleep.” Dr. Eunyoung Oh explains that there are fears that have a negative impact when experienced in childhood, and memories that can cause emotional anxiety include 'separating from parents,' 'fear of comparison or criticism,' and 'losing parental love.' It is said that there are things, etc. Next, I understand Hwang Hye-young's anxiety, saying that it seems to be the case in many cases, and that she could have developed separation anxiety, abandonment anxiety, etc.
Hwang Hye-young said that as much as her own childhood was anxious, she did not want to make her children feel anxious, and that she developed an obsession with the thought, “I have to be by my children’s side when they wake up.” However, because of these efforts, they feel like they are instilling anxiety in their children, so they blame themselves, which is a vicious cycle of anxiety. Accordingly, Dr. Eun-young Oh praises Hye-young Hwang for her hard work, but points out that she is preoccupied with “I should never do what my mother did” rather than “How can I raise my children healthily?” It is advised that psychological counseling may be necessary to face the pain.
Hyeyoung Hwang reminisces about her past, where she was unable to overcome the pain even as an adult, and recalls the time when she was diagnosed with a brain tumor before marriage. Hwang Hye-young went home without setting a date for surgery and confessed her past of trying to let go of everything, saying, “I just didn’t want to live.” Her husband, Kim Gyeong-rok, adds to the shock by saying, “It was the first time I saw my parents at the hospital, and they were just in a dazed state. I thought they would die without me.” In response, Hwang Hye-young said, “My husband also took care of me after the surgery,” revealing that she was able to survive because her husband stayed by her side. She then shed tears as she said about her parents-in-law, “When I saw my warm parents-in-law who always expressed their love, I thought, ‘I want to get married in this house.’”
Hyeyoung Hwang remembers her mother, who was always by her side when she was going through difficult times. When Hyeyoung Hwang gave birth to twins, she was in the hospital wearing a ventilator due to premature birth. She says, “My mother came for 30 minutes while I was in the hospital for 3 months.” He then shed tears, saying, “I felt so stupid,” and “I thought of my mom even after being hurt so much by her.” Dr. Oh Eun-young advises that “the desire to be loved by parents is not an unreasonable request,” and that if such a request is repeatedly frustrated, a deficiency can take root in the child’s heart. He then apologized on behalf of Hwang Hye-young's mother and said that he comforted her through her painful childhood.
'Oh Eun-young's Golden Counseling Center' airs on Channel A every Thursday at 8:10 pm to see what advice Dr. Oh Eun-young gave to the couple Hwang Hye-young and Kim Kyeong-rok to solve their problems.
Kim Ji-won, Ten Asia reporter bella@tenasia.co.kr
